Sponge bath it is.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize