didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
