i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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