I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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