What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
ok first of all what the fuck
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
