i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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