After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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