he wants to bone in the snuggie
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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