You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
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