Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
