Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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