ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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