Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize