rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
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new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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