The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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