I just pynch a tree in the face
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize