Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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