Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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