I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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