So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
