I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
