her vagine was all disorganized.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
