Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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