We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
