My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
