A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize