Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
