Nicole vs. Life
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Randomize
