a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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