He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
