some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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