Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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