Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
this hospital has no fireball
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
