I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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