Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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