All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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