I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
