yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
