apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
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