Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
