If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Randomize