Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize