They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Enjoy the penises
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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