I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
