I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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