Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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