Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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