so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
vagina is talking i cant
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
