But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
