omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
