Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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